Did You Just Call Me Stiff-Necked?

The phone jangled in my pocket signaling—well, I didn’t know what. That smartphone (much smarter than I—obviously) is always signaling one thing or another. Since I can’t always identify the different tones, I had to pull it out to see if I was missing something important.

The message was from one of my cycling buddies. “I am going to ride around 10:30.”

Even though it didn’t sound much like an invitation, it was. I like riding my bike. I like riding it with friends. I don’t even mind getting time away from my desk in the middle of the morning.

I turned him down.

“Not today. I woke up with a stiff neck.”

I hear it already.

What a wimp!

Stiff neck? Is that all?

You call yourself a rider?

I will readily agree with the criticism. I am a wimp. I let too much interfere with my riding. My commitment is definitely not on a level with many of my friends.

This is different.

Besides the pain (a secondary consideration, to be sure), there is the problem with my vision. If I can’t see my surroundings clearly, I won’t be able…

What’s that?

My vision? Well, no my eyes aren’t affected. 

It’s just that I can really only see what’s straight ahead of me if I can’t turn my head. You have to be able to view everything around you with a full range of vision when you’re riding. Otherwise, you’re just asking for disaster to strike.

I didn’t ride today. Sitting at my desk seemed a safer option.

No one ran into me at all while I was sitting here. It didn’t help my stiff neck any, but I was safe.

I didn’t get any exercise. Neither am I lying in a ditch.

Safety first. I suppose it’s a decent enough consideration. Still, I get the feeling I’m missing something.

Can we go back to the stiff neck for a minute? While I was sitting at my computer earlier, holding my neck with whichever hand was free, I began to wonder about that description of our malady.

MYMy malady.

I’ve known for a long time when someone calls you stiff-necked it means you’re stubborn

Persistent.

Obstinate.

Intractable.

Tenacious.

There are other words we often use in place of stiff-necked. The red-headed lady who raised me—always with an old saw at the ready for any situation—simply said I was stubborn as an old mule. Except for when she described me as pigheaded.

But then, I always like to put things (at least my own actions) in a positive light. I think the word I would choose is focused.

Focused is good, isn’t it?

I have a goal in mind and I travel, unwavering in my single-minded attention to the objective.

I listen to the voices around me and I am encouraged.

Follow your own path.

Seek your true purpose.

Don’t let anyone or anything convince you to abandon your dream.

We love comfort, don’t we? We long for safety.

Like this humble cyclist, we shun any hint of imprudence. Avoiding danger at all cost, we seek old, well-worn paths already known to us.

Then, when our Creator gives us new directions to follow, new roads to travel, we are reluctant to turn aside. Our intransigence, our single-mindedness comes from our stiff necks.

We have a limited field of vision. And, we like it that way.

Is it any wonder He used the exact words—stiff-necked— to describe His own followers again and again?

God wants us to open our eyes and be aware of our surroundings. All of our surroundings.  He wants us to see, not only the blessings He has for us, but also the difficulties and the tasks that await us.

When He has new things for us, we may have to shift our focus from what we’ve done previously to the new roads ahead.

I don’t know what those roads will be like. I’d like to think I’m past all the difficulties. I want to believe I’ve learned all the hard lessons.

We desire the pleasant, the comfortable. And, it’s possible that’s where He may lead us. David spoke of that path, of that lot in life:

The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes, I have a good inheritance.
(Psalm 16:6, NKJV)

Somehow, I think it just as likely our road will take us through difficult and dangerous locales. It is where our God likes to make his new roads, the roads only people with open eyes and flexible necks will be able to follow:

See, I am doing a new thing!
  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
  and streams in the wasteland.
(Isaiah 43:19, NIV)

The wilderness is new and strange.  Wasteland seems uncomfortable, perhaps even dangerous.

New territory.

Often, when I ride my bicycle, I ride familiar, well-traveled roads. They always take me to the same places I’ve been to before. Every time.

I’d like to try a new road or two before I’m done.

I’m going to do that.

When my neck is feeling better.

                                       

 

 “It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.”
(from The Fellowship of the Ring ~ J.R.R. Tolkien)  

 

© Paul Phillips. He’s Taken Leave. 2019. All Rights Reserved.

Are We Having Fun Yet?

The man said, “I’m planning to go…if the weather looks like it will be okay.

I have proof he said it.

I would have just gone on Wednesday.  I should have just gone on Wednesday.

Instead, I put on my gear, my gloves, my helmet, my shoes—yes, even my lycra shorts—and went to the old Post Office to await the start of the group bike ride.

The weather didn’t look like it would be okay.  If Christopher Robin had been there with an umbrella saying, “Tut. Tut. It looks like rain,” I would have believed him.  It did look like rain.

We rode anyway.  Five miles we rode north, thinking we’d skirt the precipitation, which looked to be heading south.  It didn’t work.

We rode in the rain.  A total of thirty miles.  Eight of us rode.  Side by side.  Stretched out in a line.  Scattered a quarter of a mile apart.  We rode in the rain.

I had a reason for being there.  I don’t know about the rest of the idiots.

My friend—the one who sent that text—is going halfway around the world for a year.  He’s leaving next week.  I wanted to have a last ride with him.

So, we rode.  In the rain.  For a reason.

Do you ever wonder why?  Why am I doing this now?  Here?  In this dismal circumstance?  Is it worth it?

I wondered. I did.

As I struggled to see through the moisture-laden lenses of my glasses, each one covered with a hundred little kaleidoscopes of water beads, I counted the cost.

When the water splattering up from the tires of the seven other cyclists in the group drenched my socks and soaked my cleated leather and cloth shoes, I considered the foundational reason for my current circumstances.

And then, as I rode close behind the cyclist ahead of me, my front tire just inches away from his rear one, attempting that all-important labor-saving maneuver—drafting—I got a faceful of dirty water.  The rooster-tail of moisture splattering up from that tire hit me full in the face, turning the kaleidoscopes on my glasses into chocolate mud I could barely see through.

Still, as I backed off from the airborne cataract, my straining eyes peered at the back of the fellow whose bicycle was the source of the annoyance.  I could read—just barely—the words printed on his cycling jersey:

If it’s not fun, why do it? 

I couldn’t help it.  The laugh just came out; from somewhere down near my belly, it erupted.

Why, indeed?

But now, a few days on, and a shower or two having helped to rid all the wrinkles in this old body of the residual mud, I’m not laughing.

I don’t know about anyone else, but somehow this road I started down under blue skies and with gentle breezes has turned downright uncomfortable.  The gear I pulled on before the ride began protects me not at all from the elements—neither the driving rain nor the blazing hot midday sun.

Somewhere along the way, the gentle rolling slopes bordered by pleasant meadows became a mountain climb with sheer dropoffs on either side.

I’m not having fun anymore.

Maybe it’s time to turn back.

But, something tells me it was never about fun.

Somehow, I get the feeling it was never about comfort.

And the Teacher told His followers that they would have trouble along the way.  Understanding their concern at that prospect, He went on to remind them that He had been all along the way and they needn’t be fearful since He had finished the entire course.  Not only finished it but had been victorious.  (John 16:23)

There are things in this world worth suffering through. 

There are.

There are things in this world worth suffering through. There are. Share on X

Friends (and people in general) are worth getting wet for.  Telling the truth is worth being laughed at for.  Being generous to a neighbor is worth doing without ourselves.

Standing firm in the storm, when that’s all we can do, is worth the toil and danger.

We’ll finish the ride up ahead.  In front of us.  Through the rain and grime.  And the heat and sweat.  And the climbing and weariness.

Ahead.

As we approached the end of our ride the other day, my friend who is headed overseas rode beside me into town.  At a corner not far from his home I made a left turn.  He went straight.  Several blocks on, me having made a right turn and he having made a left turn, we met up again.

Strange, how that happens.

He’ll leave next week for the other side of the world and I’ll stay here.  Both of us, still on the journey.

The same journey.

Headed for the same goal.  It’s where he always says he wants to end up when we start out on a bike ride.

Home.

You could ride with us, too, you know.  Side by side.  Or in single file, drafting.  Except when it rains.

Headed home.

Soon.

 

 

 

It is said that as many days as there are in the whole journey, so many are the men and horses that stand along the road, each horse and man at the interval of a day’s journey; and these are stayed neither by snow nor rain nor heat nor darkness from accomplishing their appointed course with all speed.
(Herodotus ~ Greek historian ~ 5th century BC)

 

 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.
(Philippians 3:14 ~ NLT ~ Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

 

 

© Paul Phillips. He’s Taken Leave. 2018. All Rights Reserved.

 

I Remember Peace

They were kind enough to invite me to ride with them recently.  The seasoned riders have trekked many miles together in the years I’ve been aware of them.

I usually ride alone.  

It’s not that I don’t like being with people, but simply that the logistics are less complicated when I’m the only one who has to agree to the time and length of ride.  

It would be just another ride for me, I thought, but one spent in a group of men who, like me, enjoyed the spinning of the crank and wind of freedom blowing on their faces.  

I never expected to be transported back fifty years as I rode.

It was my own fault really.  One kind member of the group, noticing my problem, rode beside me for a few moments and explained the theory I obviously didn’t grasp.

“You don’t ride much with groups, do you?  If you’ll stay with the other riders, the ride will be a lot easier.”

It didn’t take a rocket scientist to understand his meaning.  Riding in a group reduces the effect of the wind, making the ride much less taxing.  One has only to watch a professional bicycle racing team to grasp the idea.  Drafting, following each other closely, is only a part of the benefit.

I never have been good at that—staying with the group.  I’ve got my own ideas of what works, what corners to turn, how fast to ride on the downhills, and how hard to pedal up the steep slopes.  But, perhaps the kind fellow is right.

I tried to follow his advice—really, I did.  

But, they went slower than I wanted on the downhill parts.  Then they went faster than I was ready to try on the uphill sections.

And, besides that, my mind was already a thousand miles away and fifty years in the past.

I guess I’ve always done it—ridden at my own pace.  Still, the fear that knotted my insides on that long-ago day should have taught me a lesson to remember for life.  

There were usually at least five of us who rode together—sometimes more.  Through neighborhoods and across fields, down into canals and over levees, we pedaled our nondescript bikes.  Brothers, neighbors, schoolmates—it didn’t matter.  Whoever wanted to ride went along.

I heard the voices calling and jerked back from my daydreaming.

Oye vato!

The four young men standing at the corner toward which I was heading had suddenly become aware of my presence.  It took only an instant for me to realize what was going on.

As I was riding ahead of the group of ragtag boys, I had turned the corner into La Paloma without knowing it.  La Paloma was a barrio, or neighborhood, in my hometown famous for the gang that wandered its streets.  It has gotten much worse since my childhood, but even then, we knew better than to meander down its avenues idly.

The young men were headed into the street, coming straight for me.  I remembered passing someone at the corner behind as well, and glanced back.  Sure enough, he had moved onto the pavement, blocking my quick escape that way.

I was terrified.  No other word describes it.  

Terror.

I was also alone.  I can only imagine the conversation of my comrades as they gathered around the corner, just outside the neighborhood.

Can you believe he went in there?  What was the idiot thinking?  I’m not going in!  No way!

Fortunately for me, they didn’t take long to decide that somebody had to come in after the idiot.  Just in time, all of them came riding around the corner, about the moment I was trying to decide which one of the guys in front of me I might be able to knock over if I rode at him full speed.  I never found out.

As soon as the rest of the group came into view, the other boys moved back onto the verge of the parking area and simply watched us ride past.  

We rode, nonchalantly and quietly, down the street, turning the corner and riding straight home.  After fifty years, my heart still beats a little faster, remembering the fear, but also the relief.

To this day, I remember the peace that rode around the corner with those brothers and friends.  We weren’t out of danger—not by a long shot—but the relief I felt was almost palpable. 

One might think the lesson I learned on that day was of strength in numbers.  I know the truth of that, but it’s not what I remember.

I remember peace.  While still in danger, I felt peace, full and complete.

Odd, isn’t it?  The name of the barrio and its gang, La Paloma, means The Dove.  Thoughout time, the dove has been a powerful symbol of peace.  And there, in frightening circumstances, with disaster just moments away, peace fell over this young boy.

In danger, peace lives, unafraid.

Peace is not the absence of danger, but it is the assurance of safety.

Perhaps I’m not the only one who feels the danger crouching outside my door today.  I hear it in the words, see it in the eyes of both friends and acquaintances. Fear can stalk us as we see death take those we know and love.  Terror is set to spring as the world around us grows more unfamiliar and threatening.

And yet, the Savior told us He was leaving us peace.  It’s not the peace the world craves—the complete absence of danger and of conflict of any kind, but is a peace that supports in the middle of the storm.  (John 14:27)

He was about to be tortured, tried in court, and put to death.  And, He told His followers not to be troubled and afraid.  Their world was about to crash down around their shoulders and they were to continue on with peace in their souls.

It doesn’t make sense. It never has from a human perspective.

2016-07-02 17.27.40-2Once in awhile, the Lovely Lady and I feel the need to retreat.  The world presses in, its cares overwhelming the spirit.  Last weekend, we went to the mountaintop for a day or two.

We stood, overlooking the world below and heard the wind blow gently over the treetops.  In quietness, God speaks eloquently to our spirits.

Creation reminds us that our Creator is as He has always been.

We walked the hillsides of a green valley in the morning, as raindrops began to fall.  The sound of the water from heaven on the canopy of leaves and pine needles above soothed the hurts and fears in our souls.

Ah, sweet peace.

The solitude reminded me that peace has already been given us long ago.  We have only to remember where our strength comes from and realization of our certain salvation is renewed.

The psalmist wrote of it in his own contemplation.  I lift my eyes up to the hills and I realize where my strength comes from.  It comes from God the Creator, who made the heavens and the earth. (Psalm 121:1-2

Not only in the quiet, but in the hubbub, in the tormented days, and the fear-laden nights, peace can be ours.

Not only ours, peace can reign.  In our very beings, the terror is silenced, the fear put to flight.  Peace reigns.  (Colossians 3:15)

When all about us, men whisper of danger and terror in the dark, we don’t disagree.  They do exist.  They do have power.  

But, our safety is not in weapons, not in hoarded wealth, nor even in governments.  The peace those bring isn’t peace at all.  It never has been and never will be.

Peace comes only from the Giver of all good gifts.

Safety itself is ours.

Even when we ride ahead of the pack.

 

 

 

The Dove, on silver pinions
Winged her peaceful way.
(from The Pelican Island ~ James Montgomery ~ Scottish poet/hymnwriter ~ 1771-1854)

 

 

I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.
(John 14:27 ~ NLT)

 

 

 

 

 

© Paul Phillips. He’s Taken Leave. 2016. All Rights Reserved.

 

Turning

I’ve begun to map out my bicycle rides a little more carefully.

Oh, I remember how I used to laugh at my riding friends who would explain how that highway has too many patches, or there are a few too many hills to follow this road.

Wimps!  Why do you ride if you’re afraid?  What’s a little hill to a rider?  Who’s concerned about a bump or two?

Odd.  I’m still not much worried about the bumps or the hills.  No. I can dodge potholes with the best of them.  And, I’m learning how to trim the gears on the forty-year-old ten-speed well enough to climb most of the hills I encounter along the way.  Most of them.

So why would I be careful about planning my rides?  You’ll laugh.

I hate hand signals.

It’s the lane changes and turns that get me now.  Turning left?  Left arm straight out, fingers together, warning approaching traffic (both front and rear) that the lightweight bicycle is about to brave the crossing of a lane or two of oncoming cars.  Right turn?  No, not the right arm, but again the left—this time straight out from the shoulder with a right angle at the elbow aiming upwards, still with the fingers together, pointing to the sky.

I hear the laughter already.  What could be hard about that?

If you had seen the number of people who wave back at my right-hand turn signal, thinking I’m just being friendly, you’d laugh even more.  But the icing on the cake—the epitome of turn-signal blunders—was a left turn I made recently across a busy four-lane highway which has a turn lane in the center.

I rode north about half a mile along the heavily traveled state highway, staying as close to the right hand side of the shoulder as possible.  Carefully, glancing over my left shoulder repeatedly as I neared the intersection at which I was turning to the west, I stuck my left arm straight out and crossed both lanes of northbound traffic.  Riding on in the center lane to my turning point, I kept my arm out at the ninety-degree angle to my body to warn the oncoming traffic of my intentions.  It worked beyond my wildest dreams.

I was twenty feet away from the corner when I realized the next car coming toward me was a sheriff’s deputy.  He saw my arm stuck straight out and stood on his brakes, stopping short in the southbound lane, turning on the blue flashing lights in the light bar atop his vehicle.

He thought I was waving him down! 

The traffic behind him, as well as the cars coming up behind me, all stopped as I flew across the lanes and around the corner.  How embarrassing!  When the officer saw I was merely turning, he sheepishly turned off the lights and went on his way.

I didn’t look back either, but pedaled on down the little country road as fast as my tired legs could spin the wheels.

I am realizing something as I grow older.  I don’t enjoy changing directions.  For one thing, I have to take a hand off the handlebars, a decidedly tricky feat for me as my balance erodes and confidence fades.

I must also turn off the road on which I’m riding, usually a familiar route.  I like familiar routes, roads mostly chosen for ease of travel and lack of traffic.

Who knows what lies around the corner?

Often a new route leads steeply uphill—then again, sometimes just as steeply downhill, reminding me that another hill to climb will be in my path on the road back home. Just when I’ll be tired and running out of enthusiasm.

sunset-on-the-curving-roadAround curves, dodging stray dogs and potholes, the thought of unfamiliar terrain overwhelms and yes, sometimes frightens.

I don’t like transitions.

Besides how poorly I execute the maneuvers, I abhor the unknown.

During this last week, I’ve been approaching one of those turns.  As it does eventually, life has progressed to the point at which I’ve lost the first member of my nuclear family.  Things are going to change.  Again.

The status quo, the reality I have lived with for nearly sixty years, has come to an end, and my arm is out—signalling a change in direction.  I don’t want to make this turn.

We all, without exception, face these transitions.  Some are more adept at making the turn—even better at signalling their intention.  No one will mistake their turn signal for a plea for help.

Change is coming.  But then, it always has done that.  The difference is that there will be no turning around from these changes.

Realization hits and I see clearly that I actually don’t want to turn around.  This is not some bicycle ride—out a few miles and then back home.

No.  I’m headed on the home lap right now.

Home is out there ahead of me.

Around one of those corners.

I’ve been signaling this turn long enough.

Time to move on through the intersection.

I can’t get home just sitting here.

 

 

Hear my prayer, O Lord! Listen to my cries for help! Don’t ignore my tears. For I am your guest—a traveler passing through, as my ancestors were before me.
(Psalm 39:12 ~NLT)

 

 

This world is not my home, I’m just a’passin’ through.
My treasures are laid up somewhere beyond the blue.
The angels beckon me from heaven’s open door,
And I can’t feel at home in this world anymore.
(Albert Brumley ~ American songwriter ~ 1905-1977)

 

 

 

 

© Paul Phillips. He’s Taken Leave. 2015. All Rights Reserved.