I’m hungry! 

As I write this, it’s after midnight and I can’t figure out why I’m even thinking about food.  I had a little snack at 11:30 and drank a glass of fruit juice.  So why should I want to eat anything else?  Well, the problem is that I’m going for a blood test in the morning and it’s one of the “fasting” kinds (can’t figure out that word…Usually, the time just drags when I’m not eating. It’s not fast at all…).  So no food until after they stick the needle in my arm sometime after 7:00 AM.  I always think that a Honey Bun would be smart before that, just to keep me from getting queasy while watching…

What I want to know is, what is it about being told not to do something that makes me want to do it desperately?  Most nights, I can go from that little snack before midnight until 11:30 or later the next morning without craving a bite. But tonight, I just really need a little something right now!

I’m gonna blame this one on Eve…I know, not very gallant (nor even doctrinally sound), but she’s the bad example I point to when I need to rationalize my shortcomings in the area of forbidden food.  God:  “Of all the trees in the Garden, you may eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you may not eat.”  Eve:  “Adam, I want that fruit. Pick me one, will you please?  Pretty Please?”  So I’m in good company, when I say, “I’m hungry!” 

The blood test?  Oh, just my semi-annual sacrifice of blood so that my doctor, who I love, can have an excuse to castigate (I know, that even sounds medical, doesn’t it) me for my lack of exercise and self-control in dietary intake.  Well actually, I like what my oh-so-fit, run-til-it-hurts, don’t-be-a-crybaby sister-in-law said to me once.  “Paul, you don’t need to eat less (that’s the part I like!), you just need to exercise more (not so much that part…).  But the good doc, to his credit, keeps believing me when I say, “I’ll do better this time, I promise!  Yes, I understand what I need to do.  No, I do not need to take those pills!”

And now the Day-of-Reckoning has once more arrived and I’ve not walked, biked, or jogged more than three times in the last two months.  The trips to La Juerta (I love the guacamole) and La Capilla (ditto), to say nothing of Fratelli’s (Chicken Florentine is to die for, of course, not literally), have been pretty frequent lately too, so the conclusion is the ever present foregone one;  The cholesterol will be high, the triglycerides even higher. However, I’m pretty sure that the sodium levels will be within the acceptable limits.  Do you suppose that will placate him?  Will he even compliment me about my self control in not adding salt to my food?  Nooo!…He’ll just have to focus on that cholesterol number being higher than the number of candles on Uncle Sam’s birthday cake last July 4th.  And after he’s scolded me for awhile, I’ll tell him that I’ll do better next time and I understand what I need to do.  Oh!  And I don’t need those pills!  Did I tell you that I love my doctor?

So, like the night before any big exam, I’m not sleeping, but I’m not cramming either (food, that is).  At this point, a walk through town seems unproductive (it’s raining anyway), so here I sit, craving food that I can’t have.  Anybody have a Twinkie?

Why am I hungry again?

Well, I’ve finally done it!  You know…Taken leave of my…Well, it’s been a long time coming, but the day has come when it will be proven to the world that this guy’s not playing with a full deck…his elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top…he’s not the brightest crayon in the box…not even the sharpest knife in the set. 

I have things to say and finally have set up a soapbox on which to stand, a pulpit from which to preach, if you will.  I’m guessing that what I have to say will be of interest to very few people, but maybe the process of getting it written down will relieve the pressure in my brain.  I’ve maintained for the last few years that the mass of trivia with which the cranium was filled in earlier years is impeding the input of new information (at least that’s my excuse for forgetting names and appointments, along with various other semi-important information).  Perhaps the cathartic exercise of blogging will act as a relief valve and finally allow the retrieval of new information. 

If your expectation is to read an entertaining blog on a regular basis, good luck!  The ramblings of an old nut hardly fit that description, but there may be a statement of interest to read now and again.  Even a blind man with a rifle hits the target sometimes (it’s just the shots in between that keep you on edge).

I won’t waste your time telling you who I am.  If the writing proceeds as it should, you’ll figure that out as we go along.  For now, I’ll just say that I’m a fifty-something man, who sometimes is surprised at how fast he’s arrived at this time of life and wonders what has been accomplished.  Other times, I have lucid moments when I see the progression and am amazed at how full my life has been.  That seems to be the conundrum we all live with; the satisfaction, along with the longings for what might have been.  Overlying the confusion is the sure affirmation that God is in control, which is a real solace, considering the ineptitude I  frequently show in situations where maturity and skill are required.

In case you haven’t also noticed, I’m fairly long-winded, which fits rather nicely with the loopy part of me.  Maybe an editor will have to be found, but for now, skim the lines and glean anything worth keeping.  I’ll write of many things, about most of which I know very little.  You’ll be amazed at the acuity I show in demonstrating my ignorance!

Keep the straight-jacket handy!